DebraBee – Page 118

December 6, 2008

Still I Must Go

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Falling in love my heart craves deepness unknown. I am not meant for this world and instinctively I know it. It’s not something learned but when I hear the truth of it I know already what I am made for. Constant anticipation keeps my heart and thoughts enraptured. I can suffer unbearable things knowing one day I will be with my “true love”.

In the crush of waiting I do not dim. A brightness comes upon me like no other light taking away all the shadows, giving me a mere glimpse of what is to be. What does it mean to be in a light greater than the sun? Will it burn me up into nothing? So be it, still I must go, I must know…

December 4, 2008

Is That All There Is?

What are you looking forward to this holiday season? Presents? A family dinner party? A good buzz? If so there is an old song from 1969 sang by Peggy Lee you may be interested in. I have only included the chorus but you get the gist…..

“Is that all there is, is that all there is
If that’s all there is my friends, then let’s keep dancing
Let’s break out the booze and have a ball
If that’s all there is”

What are you celebrating this year?

A miraculous birth?

Matt 1:18 This is how the birth of Jesus Christ came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be with child through the Holy Spirit.

Salvation?

John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

December 4, 2008

I Am Yours

I hold my head in my hands

What else can I do

I am Yours

Can You make this noise go away

What else can I do

I am Yours

The trees are so thick now

They are hiding the sun

I am Yours

I am listening for Your voice

What else can I do

I am Yours

December 2, 2008

Love Song

The words I have to say
May well be simple but they’re true
Until you give your love
There’s nothing more that we can do

Love is the opening door
Love is what we came here for
No one could offer you more
Do you know what I mean
Have your eyes really seen

You say its very hard
To leave behind the life we knew
But there’s no other way
And now its really up to you

Love is the key we must turn
Truth is the flame we must burn
Freedom the lesson we must learn
Do you know what I mean
Have your eyes really seen

Lyrics by Elton John

December 1, 2008

A Veil Of Definitions

A Veil…..Definitions:

To cover with or as if with a veil, to conceal or disguise

Something hung up, or spread out, to intercept the view, and hide an object; a cover, a curtain; a screen, usually of gauze, crape, or similar diaphanous material, to hide or protect the face

A cover; disguise; a mask, a pretense

From the beginning of time we have been given instruction of how a veil should be made but upon the crucifixion of Christ this veil was torn from top to bottom giving us full access to the throne room.

I ask myself today why I am so afraid to let my veil down in front of all? I find my own answers in the definitions of what a veil is. I live in a world where a veil is simply common practice. My answer to why I still wear one? Fear. Fear that others will see me for what I truly am…..human and thus imperfect.

Fear is not enough to hold me back from who I am meant to be which is bigger than I see myself. With that thought I tear the veil off my own life, holding me back from greater things. Once more I jump off the cliff into the great unknown.

November 30, 2008

“Not” Like The Others

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My field of vision can be so short sighted, I can barely see past my own nose or should I say beyond my current situation. About the time I think I have gained insight as to who I am or what I am to offer others, here comes another circumstance to help set me apart from those around me.

By apart, I mean my feeling like that old song from a Sesame Street episode….

One of these things is not like the others,
One of these things just doesn’t belong,
Can you tell which thing is not like the others
By the time I finish my song?

In another life I would have thought that to be a bad thing. Today I have a new perspective.

Gal 1:15 But when God, who set me apart from birth and called me by his grace, was pleased

Indeed, “one of these is not like the others”

November 29, 2008

Responsibility Hours Away

My mental thought process can come and go in waves with very little coming to mind or an overload of input. This day we are to fly back to California and I find myself wondering about the past few days. There is certainly a peace about being in vacation mode where the biggest decision to be made is “what shall I wear”?

My husband and I will be flying back down to California later this afternoon and I have to admit I am not quite ready to put off my relaxed mindset. The hustle and bustle of caring for a house, pets, chores, bills and dare I say…the job. It’s kind of a fine line to walk between being relaxed or putting off responsibility.

Responsibility is hours away…I think I’ll stay in lounge pajamas and my socks.

November 27, 2008

A Young Man’s Joy

Thanksgiving is a special day for all beyond our stuffing the bellies full of tasty treats. We are thankful for so many things. We are grateful for the many tangible ways we are blessed. We have jobs. We have a home. We have food to eat. And more importantly we have the love of our family and friends.

Today we get to spend time in the presence of of one young man who is three years old. He is full of the innocence and wonder of life. Asking lots of questions. His laughter fills the space of every room. He is a joy. He is infectious. He is trusting and he offers his love so easily. I can learn a lot from this small boy.

November 25, 2008

The Lie Or The Truth

The lie….

Come on, now.
I hear you’re feeling down.
Well I can ease your pain,
Get you on your feet again.

The truth…

Come on, now.
I hear you’re feeling down.
Well I can ease your pain,
Get you on your feet again.

Whose version will you believe?

Jesus, a Savior or Satan, the father of lies?

Interesting how words can be used for both. We need to be wary and dig for truth.

1 John 4:1 Dear friends, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, because many false prophets have gone out into the world.

** Lyrics used from Comfortably Numb by Pink Floyd

November 24, 2008

Pretend Armor Of Youth

It was the look upon my face she said. Was I being that transparent? Had I let my guard down? My strength was a thing I’d worn proudly into every battle I’d ever been in and no one ever knew the scars I bore.

I looked closely at the armor I had been wearing and I realized it was pretend, all of it. I had made it in my youth and I just kept putting layers of denial over it until it felt strong enough to be unbendable. I’d missed the cracks.

Holding it up to the Light I realized how vulnerable I was. My armor was crumbling. It was time to seek a new armor. A few friends were kind enough to point me in the right direction of where I’d find such battle gear. In my weak state I’d need their help to make the trip.